Sometimes I feel like I'm living in that grey town in C.S. Lewis' Great Divorce. I become more and more specific in what I like that everything outside of that narrow window is completely uninteresting to me. And this pushes me away from other people and closer to myself. I think it's a good thing for an artist, but very bad for a person. And since I am both (in a lose sense), it's hard to find the right balance. Sometimes I think I've found it and then I sink into a reclusive state for days on end and feel somewhat crushed by my own... well, I don't know what really. My own tastes? My own self? But it's hard to want to continue relationships with people when all you ever had in common with them was drinking a little more than one should. I think it's important to continually experience new things, learn and grow. But I don't think that necessarily means taking on new friends and relationships and more than one can manage. Life!
This Friday the C.S. Lewis Society will be discussing George MacDonald's Lilith. I've just started reading it. So far it is my favorite thing I've ever read by MacDonald. Almost has a Great Divorce feel to it.